Entering the 3rd Reich

It was perfect… I had it all set up…. We crossed the border into Germany and I hit the button to play “The Imperial March” (Darth Vader’s theme song from Star Wars). What perfect comedy! It was met with silence! I turned up the music a few notches in case Mayara had some sort of temporary hearing defect. Still nothing! I then proceeded to plead my case as to the genius of this joke, and she was not having any of it… It must be a Brazilian thing!

Our first destination was Heidelberg, which was perfectly placed on the river Neckar. One of those truly spectacular places, it had the whole medieval trip going and it was perfect to amble around in. Unfortunately we spent the first couple of hours battling to acquire a Wi-Fi connection at the local Starbucks. Being bound for Mainz with no planned spot for the night, and we were desperately scouring the “Couch Surfing” website to find candidates to help us….  

 “Jogging!  Although I think it’s pronounced “Yogging”

In the end we failed to find a couch surfing host or a free overnight stay, so we were forced to cave for the first time on the journey and pay an excessive 26 Euros for a camping ground. In the end it wasn’t too bad considering it was situated on the beautiful river Rhine (on a side note, the whole reason we ventured towards the River Rhine, is because my father would never speak to me again if I missed it). We soon learned that the city of Mainz was holding its annual Marathon, where hoards of Germans flood the city to take part in the event and as a result half the city was now blocked off. It is always fascinating to me the joy people get from running for an extended period of time, but I think the Germans have got it right. Right after the finish line the hordes of runners are shuffled into a tent, and are promptly served hot dogs and beer….. Now I think I get it.

Benji: The couch surfing enthusiast

Coming off the autobahn into Munich we went through our first police inspection. The ever efficient German police must have concluded that May and I fit the bill as international drug lords. As I detailed my intentions for Munich and our grand adventure they quickly realised we weren’t the criminal masterminds that would jeopardise the future of all Bavarians. In fact they seemed genuinely interested in our trip, in which I was happy to indulge them (I wonder if they have checked out our page after I gave them flyers?)

We soon made contact with Benjamin and his wife Ping, who kindly agreed to host both of us for the night. This was our first couch surfing experience and what a wonderful couple to introduce us to this world. They showed us their city, cooked for us and were so genuine in their love for travel and indeed hosting people through the couch surfing community.  The day of our departure from Munich, Benji drove us to the only concentration camp to remain open throughout the entire length of the war, Dachau.

A bland and depressing place, but never the less, important to visit. For anybody who has ever visited a place like this, I assume the feeling is the same and you leave emotionally drained. This was only interrupted by a truly spectacular bail by Benji. I liken it to sitting in Church as a kid, and trying desperately not to laugh, you know it’s inappropriate, but funny is funny. The problem is that it seemed to take 15 minutes for the big fella to finally hit the deck… Sorry Benji , hope the foot is ok mate. J

“This is Austria! Not some Bazaar in Morocco”

Was the response I received to our feeble attempt at negotiating the price for our campsite in Salzburg, this same sentiment was echoed in similar fashion on two other occasions. (I’ll get back to this later) Austrian driving rules state children less than 12 years of age and below the height of 1.5m are not allowed to travel in the front unless they are in a proper child restraint seat. Otherwise they must be fastened with a seat belt at the back. You must purchase a tax sticker permitting use of the motorways, you must use dipped headlights at all times, horns are not allowed anywhere, parking must all face the same way and on the right hand side of the road. Basically rules are rules and there is no room for negotiation.

I was definitely the worst dressed in Salzburg. I was looked at with disgust by of the locals (I suppose I couldn’t really blame them, then or now) Salzburg is the birth place of Mozart and it seems that the locals are constantly trying to live up to this expectation, with 17^th Century classical compositions echoing through the cobbled stone streets, and everybody dressed ready to attend the opera. All in all, I found it all rather pretentious. That is, until we met Kristina!

Kristina was an Austrian arts director (seemed to be in her mid-seventies), who has lived in New York & Los Angeles, been a top class ballet dancer and rubbed shoulders with A class celebrities.  We met her as she was scarfing down two burgers at McDonalds.  “Go to the youtube!” was her enthusiastic request as we were stealing Macca’s WiFi. She directed us to a Youtube clip of her in Salzburg talking with Tom Cruise, “Press see-more button” which revealed additional information about the clip and Kristina’s credentials. As we spoke, I commented that the city itself was quite small, her retort was “Just like the brains of the people living in it” she went on how she didn’t like Salzburg very much and how she longed for the “big apple”. Kristina was a gem and was a huge breath of fresh air in a potentially stuffy atmosphere.

As I said previously the attitude of “This is Austria!” only made sense when we left Vienna for Budapest in Hungary. Austria lies in the middle of Germany, Slovenia, Slovakia & Hungary (not to mention Italy, Switzerland and the Czech Republic) and is somewhat of a Segue to Eastern Europe, where rules are not necessarily rules and a kind of anything goes attitude begins. It’s also where scams and petty crime starts becoming apparent, the Austrians definitely want to disassociate themselves with this.